I Seriously Need A Speed Bump Between My Brain and Mouth – How Can I Do It?

I’m sure you’ve seen lots of movies and read lots of articles about this, but what the heck is a speed bump? I heard it was in some sort of old Clint Eastwood western, but never found it. I don’t even know why it’s called the “speed bump” because if anything, I would have used a much shorter name like “speed shank” or “speed cone”. Anyway, I need a speed bump and I’m going to go search for it on the Internet.

One way I can get a speed bump for my head is by taking off my shirt and placing it between my head and stomach. I will be driving along and feel like I’m going as fast as the road allows, and when I notice that I’m starting to slow down, I will slow down just a little more and push up on the brake a little bit. This should do it, and you may even see some improvement in your car speed, but remember that it’s still a safety device so don’t drive while talking on your cell phone or doing any other distracting things while driving. And, if you can, please wear your seatbelt!

Also, if you’re reading this article, I’m assuming that you have a car and are, more than likely, on a major highway or interstate, so I will recommend that you look into purchasing a good anti-theft system to attach to your key chain (the best ones have cameras and you can even use them to spy on your kids! :P ). That way, should you ever be in a rush, you won’t have to slow down to break the speed barrier and you’ll be able to keep your car right where you are: on the road! If you do purchase an anti-theft device or a bumper, make sure you purchase the exact model that came with your car, otherwise you may find that your new device doesn’t work with your car because it’s not the right size, shape, or weight.